Since it’s “vacation season” here in the US, we’ve had more than one couple tell us how they are wondering if they’ve spent too much time together for their own good…

In just a moment, we’ll give you our thoughts about whether it’s really possible to spend TOO much time together but
first, we want to tell you about something we’re doing in just a few days for men.

As you may recall, Otto has just launched his new website for MEN and is giving away a free ebook called “10 Keys To Lighting Up Your Woman” to every man who signs up for his newsletter.

Also… something Otto just announced is that we’re doing a teleseminar for men in just a few days called “10 Things EVERY Woman Wants From Her Man AND How You Can Give These Things To Her.” If you’re a guy and want to find out more, check it out.

As record heat fries the eastern half of the USA (including where we live) over the past few days, experts warn of the dangers of over-exposure to our bodies.

It’s just plain hot.

Even if you aren’t struggling with this heat wave where you live, chances are you’ve taken some kind of vacation
with your family or maybe gotten together with family or friends for an extended time together.

If you have ever spent some extended time with more intense interaction than you normally do, there’s also a pretty good chance that with all of this social interaction and “togetherness,” you might feel a bit “over-exposed” to the ones you love.

You might have felt like there was a little too much togetherness and your love (and patience) may have been tested .

After a brief vacation together, one family we know found themselves picking arguments with each other that was out of the ordinary for them.

The dad made the comment to us that “We’ve been together a little bit too too long right now.”

What we know is that “over-exposure to the ones we love” feeling, along with the stresses that vacations can bring–heat, dealing with crowds of people, trying to get around in unfamiliar places, erratic eating schedules or rich and unfamiliar food –can certainly play havoc in the best relationships, even if you think you’re doing pretty well.

If you can relate…

Here are some specific ways you might react when you’ve been together a little too long or have “vacation-itis” and
some suggestions to “cool” down your and others’ emotions and reactions…

1. Communication misfires that come up now and then seem to be exaggerated and over-blown.

Carla and her husband Jay rented a kayak when they were vacationing together in the Great Lakes region.

Being relatively new to kayaking, they found that they became very irritated with one another as they tried to paddle (sometimes in opposite directions) to their destination.

They couldn’t establish a rhythm that worked for both of them–Carla wanted to paddle slower than Jay and he became anxious when they were out of sync.

On top of that, they each seemed to have their own “plans” for getting where they were going but “forgot” to share them with each other.

Normally, they get along pretty well but it became clear that their usual way of communicating (or not communicating) didn’t work as well when they were in one boat, trying to go in one direction.

And it was a metaphor for what happens in their life together.

Afterwards their kayak experience, Carla discovered that she pushes Jay to be the leader but then does her own thing when she feels afraid or triggered.

Jay discovered that when he gets irritated with Carla, he becomes superior and sarcastic which only makes the situation and communication worse.

We talk a lot about “magic words” that can make a big difference in your communication and if Carla or Jay had asked one of our “Magic Words” questions like this…

“How can we make this situation work better?”

…with a completely open heart, their kayak trip might have been more enjoyable.

They could even have some fun with it and imagine all kinds of ways to make their situation better–like sawing the kayak in half or skipping the paddling part and going for a swim from the boat–along with clearly talking about a plan that might help them work together.

As you can clearly see, “Magic Words” and questions like these can truly make a big difference in the quality of your communication and your love when you use them.

Another way that too much time together can create a feeling of “overexposure”…

2. Trust and jealousy issues come to the forefront.

If there are any jealousy and trust issues in a relationship, they get triggered big time in the summer when other men and women wear practically nothing.

Pam felt very uncomfortable thinking about going on a vacation with her husband Paul to the Bahamas because
of all the women in bikinis they would see on the beaches.

Normally, they didn’t go many places where she would have to endure having him look at these other women wearing practically nothing–so it wasn’t too much of a problem–except now and then.

But when Pam’s jealousy did erupt, it put a damper on everything–and she certainly didn’t want that to happen on her vacation.

In this situation, we’d recommend that Pam practice noticing her self-talk and the stories she makes up when she gets jealous.

When she identifies her “stories”–like the story that Paul wants to be with the woman in the bikini more than her, she can question whether she knows that’s true or not.

If she’s honest with herself, she’ll admit that she doesn’t know that’s true–and then she can learn to switch her
thinking to examples of when he’s shown her that he loves her.

As she changes her focus, she learns to calm her suspicious thoughts and jealousy.

3. If you’re feeling like there’s too much togetherness, you might even begin to wonder why you’re with your partner because the two of you just can’t seem to get along.

Okay, so this is extreme but it might cross your mind in the throes of conflict and when you’ve really had enough of each other.

If this happens, take a breath, take a walk by yourself or do something that will break the stale-mate that you can’t seem to get out of.

When you both are in a calmer, more centered place, talk about what you both want and need. And listen to each other.

If your disagreements are deeply-rooted and you need some help getting some resolution, don’t give up on the relationship until you’ve gotten the help of a therapist or coach.

If you want help sorting out your situation in complete privacy, we have a program “Should you stay or should you go?” that can help you.

Over-exposure to each other can be a good thing.

It can lead you to discovering some valuable things about each other that will open the door to deepening your love and connection if you’re open to working through the challenges of the moment when you get irritated or overexposed.

So have fun this summer and remember your sun

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Falling in love is easy. It’s a matter of feeling that attraction to another and then acting on it. It’s allowing yourself to feel that urge to want to be with that person above all else and share your life with him or her.

What deliciousness when it happens!

But when that feeling of being “in love” fades, you’re left with a pretty hopeless, dismal feeling.

Here’s a question a woman asked us and our answer to her…

“I have fallen out of love with my husband for the past 3 years and I am wondering if it is too late to get those ‘in love’ feelings back?”

Our answer…

Here’s the truth–Most of us move in and out of feeling “in love” with our partners. Feeling “in love” is just a concept that means something different to everyone. When things are going well and we feel close and connected–and our beloved is feeling the same, we’re in love. When one of us is not, we can find ourselves feeling love for the other but not “in love” at that moment. You may not even like him or her in those moments let alone feeling amorous love.

Now if this distance and disconnection goes on for a long time, it’s a serious problem in the relationship–especially if one or both people want more.

Can you rekindle love?

Yes, you certainly can but you both have to WANT it to happen. You can’t do it if you have one foot in the relationship and one foot out.

Here are a few ideas if you are wanting to find more time to rekindle and keep love alive in your relationship…

1. Decide what you truly want. If you want to rekindle the “fire,” then what does that mean to each of you? Talk about how you both like your connection and relationship to be without blame and without getting defensive. Be honest about what really excites you. Just be honest–with yourself and with him–because if you aren’t, you risk your relationship completely dying.

2. Focus on your positive outcome. Get on the same page, if possible, and hold that vision for how you’d like to be together. You will have the energy to move toward what you want if you just hold that as your vision for your life.

3. Make this a fun experience rather than something that “should” be done. If you don’t make it fun, you’re just going through the motions and nothing will change.

Find the time for closeness and connection. It has to feel really good in order to choose an activity that will bring you closer rather than one requires nothing of you. Even tiredness seems to dissolve when the rewards outweigh the allure of “vegging” out.

From our own lives and from observing the lives of many people, we’ve found that you can make one of two choices:

You can allow others or circumstances to dictate the course of your life or you can be a conscious creator of your life. The choice is yours.

Look inside you and then take the steps toward what you want.

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Some of the best marriage advice should be taken into consideration before you actually walk down the aisle. For instance, you’ll need to know how your partner handles money before you get married. Studies have shown that the main reason for divorce and marital problems is money, so once you know how your partner handles finances-and how well that compliments your money style-you can eliminate a number of arguments. If one of you is a saver and the other is a spender, it’s very important that you talk about how much money you will need to save every month, and how much you can spend on recreational activities or household decor after the bills are paid. If these types of things are not discussed beforehand, they could cause serious problems in the relationship.

Learning how your partner will handle raising children is another important piece of marriage advice that you’ll want to pay attention to. Will your partner be more of the disciplinary type? Would he or she rather leave that up to you? Even before you talk about how you will raise your kids in a marriage relationship, you and your partner need to talk about when you think you will be ready to expand your family, and how many children you want to have. Knowing this information before the wedding will make you completely aware of your partner’s expectations. It’s definitely not a good idea to wait until you want to start trying for a baby to talk about who will stay home with the child, or how long you should wait before having another baby. When your family is growing, this is cause a great deal of stress if you’re not prepared, and could damage the marriage.

Romantic relationships take a lot of maintenance as well, which is why you may get marriage advice like ‘keep the romance alive’ and ‘date as much as you can’. Even if you’re not able to go out to dinner as much as you would like, buying your partner a bouquet of flowers every once in a while, or preparing a gourmet dinner at home is a great way to keep your marriage strong and improve the family dynamic.

entrepreneur who writes on relationship issues.

More strong marriage advices and also how to save relationship and marriage, you can find at this site or visit my blog, watch videos.

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You most likely think you must do something if you are one of the people who are faced with these certain several relationship problems. But what must you really do? How do you stop an imminent divorce without making your spouse feel angry and defensive? Even if it’s a confusing problem, you have to deal with it if you want to save your marriage.

There are various of advice that can help you if you want to prevent a break up or divorce. Then again, not all is worth listening or sticking to. Nevertheless, there are lots of sources that can help you trigger the feelings of your spouse. You need a plan of action if you like to save your relationship.

Some of the most generally utilized sources in saving a relationship are attained using the Internet. Thanks to to the arrival of e-books and a variety of websites dedicated to help work out relationship problems, more people are using the Internet for advice.} If it can present you step by step details on how to save marriage and prevent a divorce, therefore the advice the you’re able to acquire is a good thing.

When it comes to saving a marriage, there were limited options previously. It’s because nearly all of those who ask for counseling are reluctant because they do not want to deal with the expense. But that’s why e-books are great. Against one hour of counseling, e-books are less expensive and may be used at once because you only have to download it. And the advice that you have to use is easily obtainable when you want it since they are saved inside your computer.

There are tips and techniques that can be used to generate interest and fascination, thus saving your marriage. You’ll learn how to fight relationship warning signs and how to take steps as opposed to merely reacting as you build a stronger relationship. If the both of you are experiencing certain obstacles even if you are both truly in love, don’t be terrified. You simply have to act on it. If the right advice is capable of giving you the capability to save marriage and stop a divorce, then you do not have to worry.

Is your marriage collapsing right now? Are you getting scared that your marriage might go down the drain? For some tips on how to solve your marital problems,   visit Save My Marriage

Are you having the get feeling that your spouse is not being really truthful with you? If you want to know if your guesses are true,   read How to Catch Cheating

Have you recently split up with your girlfriend? Are you contented with what took place, or are you one of those who believed they had a mistake? If you like your girlfriend back, go to Get your Girlfriend Back

I got this piece of good news from a local forum but the original source is from Daily Mail UK.

Anybody reading this hoping for a quick fix formula for a successful marriage, look away now. 

According to a poll of 4,000 married couples, the secret to a happy marriage is spending at least 22 periods of ‘quality time’ together a month, with at least seven cosy nights in and two proper dinner dates.

Cuddles, it seems hold the key, with couples who cuddle four times a day rating their marriage as very happy.

And romantic gestures such as running a nice bath or a back massage are necessary every 10 days. 

Those who described themselves as ‘very happy’ say the key to a successful partnership lies in spending lots of quality time together.

 

“Affection, cuddles and romantic gestures are part of a whole romantic scene which is desired by those entering a relationship,” said Chief Educational Psychologist Dr Ludwig F.Lowenstein.

“They are the safe gestures which say – ‘I like you, I am glad to be with you, I like and appreciate your support and care.’   

“In this busy world we often take our partners for granted whilst we get on with our daily struggles of work and rearing a family.

“We tend to forget the importance of hugs when familiarity becomes part of our lives, and as the saying goes ‘familiarity breeds contempt’, but if affection, cuddles and romantic gestures become part of our relationship then the relationship will become strong and remain strong.

 The survey revealed that the average happy couple enjoy two romantic walks, one visit to the pub and one trip to the cinema every month.

They will also spend a few romantic evenings in – eating dinner by candlelight three times a month, engaging in a proper conversation six times a month and curling up in front of the TV together seven times a month.

Flowers & Chocolates

Twice a month husband and wife should shower each other with surprise gifts – such as flowers and chocolates, or more personal items such as a soppy poem or a favourite piece of music. 

A good marriage would also allow each partner to enjoy a night away from home without the other, in the company of their own friends.

Simple acts such as cleaning the house from top to bottom without being asked, or making breakfast in bed show respect for the other spouse.

And the loved-up pair will pack their bags to enjoy two short breaks in the UK and two longer holidays abroad every year.

Jim Forward of Warner Leisure Hotels, said: “Cuddles and romantic weekends away are key for a great relationship and now it’s been confirmed. It proves how important it is for couples to make time for each other.

“A successful relationship is built on trust and love for each other. This should be communicated or shown whenever couples have the chance.

“But Brits are increasingly becoming rushed off their feet and it’s sometimes easy to forget to fully appreciate your ‘other half.” 

A staggering 98 per cent of the ‘very happy’ couples say they feel really lucky to be in such a stable relationship – and 94 per cent genuinely believe no other relationship is as solid as theirs.

The Key to Long Lasting Relationship:

Cuddles: 4 a day
Romantic gestures:  3 a month 
Dinner dates: 2 a month
Romantic walks: 2 a month
Romantic gifts: 2 a month
Home cooked romantic meals: 3 a month 
Breakfast in bed: 1 a month 
Proper conversation: 6 a month 
Trip to the pub: 1 a month 
Cosy evenings in: 7 a month
Clean house from top to bottom: 3 a month
Night out without each other: 1 a month
Cinema or theatre: 1 a month 
Short UK break: 2 a year 
Holiday: 2 a year

After reading this article, I am fully convince that it does take time and effort to build a solid relationship. And based on my experience, alot of times relationship falls apart due to lack of communication. Yes, hugs and kisses are a form of non-verbal communication. 

Remember to have a check list and take your daily dose of intimacy. Have a great relationship!