You can feel as if you are being pulled in different directions. You want to go out and have fun with your friends, but you want to be with your partner too. Spending time with your partner should not feel like a chore. But if every time you want to go out with your friends it causes an argument with your partner, you may come to resent the time spent with him.

Do not see a full time relationship with your partner as oppression. You can have the best of both worlds. You can still go out and have fun with your friends and also have fun with your partner. As well as having someone to go home to and share things with. Something single people hanker for.

You need to strike a balance in your relationship. Have one or two nights a week when you both go out with your friends. Then it will not mean one of you is home alone resenting the other going out. Then there will be less chance of an argument. You can have fun with them the next night. It does a relationship good to spend some time apart; you appreciate time with each other much more.

But maybe especially when you have first moved in with your partner you feel that you do not really fit in with your friends any more. They want you to go out with them and have fun. If you keep turning them down they say you are no fun any more. You are fun. But they need to understand you have different priorities now. Yes you still want fun with them, but to be honest if they are out looking for guys then that is not what you want because you have already found yours. So if that is what they are interested in you are not, make it clear to them you are happy with your boyfriend and not looking for that sort of fun.

You can all still have fun that does not involve meeting guys. It may even be a nice change for them! You can have an agreement that when they go out with you and other attached friends it is guy free. The single ones can have pulling nights when you are not with them. This will stop any bad feelings and falling out. And of course any misunderstandings with your boyfriend.

They say you have changed. Yes you have. Because your life has changed. When you move in with your boyfriend you have different priorities and responsibilities, house, bills, getting used to living together, house work, shopping. You may look at your friends and see them as immature, whatever age they are.

They may get at you for wanting to be with your partner more than them, but the fact is most of them are really jealous of you because you have what they really want. It looks fun in a different bar every night meeting different guys, but why do most of them do it? To meet the one. To be like you and to have what you have.

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The first dating tip is to consider the friendship. Is it strong enough to handle hurts inflicted by one another? This question isn’t asking if both of you feel loyalty or a strong bond between each other, but how communicative are both of you when it comes to expressing hurts, disappointments and feelings inflicted by one another? Do both of you ignore it, hold it in and pretend you never hurt each other? Or do you confront those issues and deal with them, and because of that, you are close enough to be blood brothers? Shared experiences and common bonds isn’t what makes a friendship strong enough to handle someone dating the other friend’s ex – it’s communication. If you don’t have that in your friendship, dating your friend’s ex will damage your friendship, sometimes beyond repair.

The second dating tip is to consider the ex-girlfriend. Will dating her cause her to relive her wounds and hurts carried over from her previous relationship with your friend? Since ties wouldn’t be cut off completely, she would still be around, see and/or be in the presence of her ex. Can she handle that, or will it cause more wounds and prevent her from healing and addressing those hurts? More than likely, even if she is able to treat you differently than she treated your friend, she will still be affected by her previous relationship and you will have to deal with those old issues, plus new issues that come about with the new relationship. The bottom line here is that proximity in a relationship triangle can be like juggling grenades. Just because the grenade is in the other hand doesn’t mean it’s less dangerous.

The third dating tip is to not get into a relationship so quickly. Give it some time for the dust to settle, emotions have died down, wounds have had a chance to heal and people have had a chance to move on with their lives. When a relationship dies down, it’s like a tornado that is coming to its end. It’s still turbulent and windy, and it takes time to clean up the rubble left in the aftermath. If you wait and are patient, then you can avoid the awkwardness and surprise of it all. If you don’t and are impatient, it’ll be like walking into the tornado thinking it’s done and over and getting picked up and thrown 100 yards into a ditch.

It’s not an easy call to date an ex-girlfriend of a friend, but hopefully these 3 dating tips will help you make a good decision. If it doesn’t work out, there’s always matchmaking which matches you with a person that you’re bound to enjoy being with, based on your preferences and personality. Parker and I tried hanging out again after college for some time, but things were never quite the same. We had also grown apart over the years and the experience in high school changed us both. Take it from me, it’s better to have a friend than to lose both a friend and a relationship.

Allan Tan is an experienced writer on Romance Pros, dating, and relationships. He has been writing for many years on Romance Pros and has had countless articles published throughout various mediums. Some of Allan’s most favorite topics to write on include single professionals, mature daters, relationships, matchmaking, and Romance Pros. Allan’s articles are well written and memorable. They are especially great for anyone looking to start dating and still keep up with their daily activities.

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Dale Carneige, the famous author of How to Win Friends & Influence People pointed out that you can win more friends in two months by being interested in others than you can in two years by making others interested in you. 

Although Dale Carnegie died in 1955, his work in personal development still lives on. His book, How to Win Friends & Influence People first began publishing in 1937 and have since been the grandfather of “People Skills” books. 

Because of his great understanding of human nature, his books and fundamental teaching are just as popular as they were before. In fact, the title of his book is so widely used as a phrase, that some people who say it that may not even know where the phrase ‘how to win friends and influence people’ comes from.

Here are his six solid principles of making others like you: 

Becoming genuinely interested in others

I believe you have met some people who seem interested in you but some how you sense that they aren’t. There don’t seem to be genuine in you and we sometimes label them as ‘phoney’. This could be one rare case of ‘fake it until you make it’ that won’t work. So, how do you become genuinely interested in others? Well, you can start by asking them questions, learn more about what they do, what they like. everyone like to talk about themselves. Get them to talk about their dreams.

Smile 

There is nothing much to add here. If you are not doing it right now, remember to smile the next time you walk into a room. That smile is your people magnet. 

Use a person´s name

Remember that a person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound no matter what language it is. Just like in the old romantic movies: “Oh, John… John!” “Oh, Mary, dear Mary!”

Be a good listener

Encourage others to talk about themselves. If you do this sincerely and is interested in the other person, you cannot fail to encourage the other party to feel valued and appreciated. This is one of the key trait for anyone who have mastered people skills. 

Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

The same principle ass above. This principle stress the importance of listening and communicating in term of what the other person like. If you do not know what to talk about, let their response guide the direction of your conversation and you will enjoy a solid rapport that encourages friendship

Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely

This is a tricky one. This principle cannot be fake for long. Look for the good in others and respect their beliefs and lifestyles, even if they do not make sense to you. This flexibility is important if you are to respect others. 

His last three points, tie into the first. How to win friends and influence people is a book that reminds us that anything you do from a place of fellowship will have a good result. He uses this fable to prove his point:

The sun and the wind were arguing about who was the strongest. The wind pointed at an old man. The wind said that he’d prove his strength by getting the man to remove his coat. He blew and howled and blew some more.

The old man clung to his coat more than ever. When the wind finally gave up, the sun came out from behind a cloud and shone brightly. Soon the man was wiping his forehead and removing his coat.

As you have already found out, making new friends is an art by itself, since not many of us have a long list of friends. The more friends you make, the more you will grow in your social stature and personality. In order to make new friends, you must be friendly in nature as well as having sweet disposition. There are alot of ways you can make new friends. Being extrovert and outgoing can be the deciding factor when it comes to making new friends.

Friendship is made out of trust for each other and understanding each other’s belief. Though it does take awhile to gain trust and understand one’s belief, its not that hard. Experts suggest that, to make new friends, you need to get close to the person.This is also called the cultural barrier. Its an emotional barrier that prevent your future friend to trust you. Once the barrier is breach, you may start creating meaningful friendship. 

There are other ways of making new friends and here are some popular ways you can try to create friendship. To make new friends, you have to create an atmosphere where the other person will feel at ease to your manners and attitude. Never allow your new friend to get bored to what you say. Rude behavior or boorishness are a strict no-no. 

Another easy method for making friends is using the FORM system. FORM system is known to create a good atmosphere of friendship and companionship. FORM simply means Family, Occupation, Recreation & Message. Most of us have our family, relatives or siblings. When you enquire any person about his/her family, you’re making sure that his/her immediate concerns are first addressed, which draws that person towards your circle, a slow step by step. Everyone of us love to talk about ourselves, our family, children etc. 

Once you know the family status of your new friend, then the next question will be to ask about his/her occupation. Another area we love to talk about is our jobs and position and what we have achieve. By enquiring about occupation, you’re ensuring that you are coming much closer to other person’s inner circle. 

The third step is to casually talk about his/her recreation. Does your new friend like pets? What do they do during weekends? During this stage, you are probably inching much closer to a new friendship. Talk anything about those wonderful hobbies and sports. Exchange views and ideas, which are mutually beneficial to both of you.

Probably the most important step is the “Message” step, when you should leave out a message that is easy to remember by the other person. This final message must also bear your address and contact number in form of a visiting card. Message may include something about your name, profession, address and your honest opinion about the person whom you’re trying to make new friends with. Never forget to say thank you at the end of the conversation and always keep your options open, to decide if you want to be friends with the other person. Follow up with that person if you’re keen on making a new friendship. But remember friendships are about give and take, and supporting each other. Never hurt their sentiments and emotions in any manner. Be courteous and gentle, especially if the other person happens to be a woman.